I just LOVE when I back-slide into the shit. SUCH fun. This time, it all started with Reilly and the realization that I have basically wasted the past 15 1/2 years of my life, as I've clearly done a shit job raising him. I think I told you recently that his grades had slipped a bit. I wish. They are officially in the dumper. Worse than that though, was getting e-mails from TWO teachers on Thursday informing me of his rude, insolent & disruptive classroom behavior of late. Lovely. The first thing I did was call the school & have him pulled from class so I could talk to him. I told him he was NOT going to lacrosse practice, and that he'd better get his ass on the bus and come home.
As you might imagine, Thursday afternoon and evening were hideous. World War 12. Not only did I have him miss practice, I also took his phone until further notice. The thing that is making me so crazy is that he's caught... he's nailed... yet he REFUSES to accept responsibility for his actions. It's the same shit I've heard a million times in the past 3 years... "this teacher hates me... that teacher is mean to me"... blah, blah, blah. I made sure the ape knew that even if his claims were true... which I KNOW they are NOT.... that it doesn't fucking matter!!! There's NO rule that says his teachers have to be nice to him or like him. Get over it!!! Sack up, kiss some ass and do your fucking work!!!
I was really at a loss as how to proceed. I know he needs lacrosse and I want him to have it. But as I told his coach, I cannot & will not accept the behavior he's been displaying at home and at school, and obviously, his grades HAVE to come up. I e-mailed the head coach several times on Thursay & Friday and got no response. I've gotta tell ya... NOT happy about that...especially since I had no way to contact Reilly's coach, and was relying on coach L to forward my e-mails. Since I didn't hear from him, I pulled Reilly from practice again yesterday. And again, I got nothing but attitude and bullshit from him all night. Great. So today is supposed to be a big day for the teams... first they have practice, then a jv scrimmage and a varsity scrimmage, followed by a BBQ for all LAX players this evening. I took him to school early so I could talk to his coach. He'd never gotten the e-mails from the other coach. Great. Thanks. Anyhoo.... I filled him in and asked for his help. I REALLY like this coach. He is a teacher too, so he's not just a crazed sports freak. He's tough as balls, but he's a very good man that has the potential to make a serious difference in Reilly's life. We made a plan for today... he was headed in to pull Reilly into his office for a wee chat. I told him I'd appreciate it if he scared the shit out of the kid and then ran him til he puked. No problem. :0) He will then have to sit and watch the jv scrimmage as punishment for missing practice, and during the varsity scrimmage, he will basically be their bitch. As for the BBQ... we'll see. I'm going to connect with coach later in the day and see how Reilly did. It's not a 'team event'... purely a social function, and I don't know that he deserves to attend.
He has started to try and right the wrongs at school... he e-mailed each of his teachers an apology and told them he knew he was doing poorly and had no excuse. He also asked for extra work and has already scheduled a couple of make-up tests. Fingers crossed.
Learning that he was being so rude to his teachers absolutely sent me reeling. I have worked so hard to keep in contact with all of them, and I really thought he was finished being a butt head while at school. He started the school year SO strongly, and I just hate that he's let it get away from him. But since he's 15, there's only so much I can do. I can't MAKE him do anything. I have talked to this kid til I was blue in the face for the past few days... to no avail. Then this morning he comes in and tells me he talked to uncle Chris, and now he understands that he created the problem. Are you fucking KIDDING me??? He's taking advice from a jack-ass man child who is STILL coddled by his parents at age 40, and has NO CLUE about parenting, or even being a role model for Christ's sake. I LOST it. NOT HAPPY. I'm glad the kid feels like he can talk to Chris, but I made sure to tell him that his advice is about as valuable as a pile of shit.
Did I mention that those ASSHOLES in Florida AND Reilly's Godfather have had NO response to my e-mails about the boys' fundraising efforts? They can't even support them in that way???? They positively DISGUST me.
I'm really hoping the kid comes home today in pain from getting his ass worked harder than he ever imagined it could be. A few tears wouldn't hurt either.
Better go.... snuggle time with Finn & the wee ones. :0)
xoxo
S
Trying to survive and thrive, through the most difficult time in my life.
05 March 2011
04 March 2011
An excerpt from HelloGrief.org
Hey all... having a particularly rough day.... one where I just want to crawl in my bed and sleep until all of this shit goes away. Bad news for me... it doesn't go away... ever. Found this article and thought it might help explain some of the ups and downs of this process, and why I can have a great day or week and then fall into the abyss once again.
xoxo
S
How Did GRIEF Get an Expiration Date?
Certain things need an expiration date. Milk, eggs, mayonnaise, meat, fish… there is a time we need to be done with them, and throw them away… I get all that. But does grief have an expiration date? For some reason, there seems to be an acceptable shelf life—6-12 months—and then grief should be off the shelf, out of the home and permanently removed with the weekly trash service. If it was only that simple…The “grief expiration date” myth must come from people who have never experienced a close death – otherwise they would know the truth. Everyone fears facing such a loss. They are hopeful that should death touch their world, it will only take 6-12 months to recover. No one wants someone they love to die. So, until faced with the reality, it’s easier to think ‘this won’t happen to me, AND if it does it will only be bad for a finite, short amount of time and then…there’s an expiration date and it is magically all gone.’ What a wonderful world that would be.
I’ve heard time and time again there is a societal expectation to “get over” grief in 6 months, and at the longest, a year. Those who aren’t grieving believe it, and often those who are also believe it - this sets grieving people up for false, and ultimately disappointing, expectations.
The one year mark looms like some golden carrot over the heads of those who are grieving. It is a symbol of hope that if they make it to the one year mark they will be in a much happier and pain free place.
The reality is they won’t be over it, nor should they be. If someone spent years loving another person, the pain of that person’s death simply will not be removed due to a date on the calendar.
The opposite actually might happen – people who are grieving may feel even more pain in year two because the initial numbness, which often serves as a protective barrier at the onset of loss, has worn off and they begin experiencing the full intensity of their feelings and grief. This is accompanied by the realization that life with loss is their “new normal.”
I lost my mother at 9 and father at 12. I remember feeling the expectation of a grief expiration date myself. I remember being 15, five years after my mother died and three years after my father died. If I had a tough day missing my parents, people looked shocked, or avoided the subject, or avoided me. Sometimes I would hear insensitive comments, like “aren’t you over that?” Or when someone experienced a more recent loss, I would get “Oh, poor [so and so]. What a tragic loss. Aren’t you glad you are over that now?”
I remember beating myself up and doubting how well I was coping. If you allow yourself to believe there is an expiration date for grief, you will start to think you aren’t doing well if you still miss your loved one 5, 10, 20, 40 years after the loss. In reality – it’s normal. And it’s okay.
This is what I know to be true:
Grief IS a life-long journey. An emotional handicap you get up, and live with everyday. It doesn’t mean you can’t lead a happy life, but it is a choice, and takes work.
The frequency and intensity of those grief pangs/knives should lessen over time, but the reality is every now and then for the rest of your life, you will feel those pangs. Everyone grieves at their own pace, and in their own way. There is no one way to grieve, and no certain order, and no timeline. There is definitely not an expiration date.
Grief will take on different forms in different people. Not everyone cries; others cry all the time. Some exercise a lot. Others talk about it a lot. Many seek counseling or join a support group, and enjoy the company of a good and understanding listener.
If years after your loss, thinking of your loved one missing a special day or milestone in your life, makes you sad, puts you in a funk, or makes you cry, don’t beat yourself up. Allow yourself the ability to grieve the loss of memories not created. As long as the frequency and intensity of grief eases—even if it is slowly over time—you are coping in positive ways. Alternatively, if years after the loss, you can’t bear the mention of your loved ones name, you sleep all day, you aren’t participating in your normal everyday activities, you do things to “numb” or escape your grief, those are warning signs that you are not coping well, and should seek the assistance you need to begin healing.
Grieving in a healthy manner, taking steps to move forward, and rebuild your life with a new normal, doesn’t mean you won’t have those tough days or tough moments.
There is no expiration date. Grief never fully goes away. That doesn’t have to mean you can’t and won’t live a happy and productive life. What it does mean is the love you shared with loved ones lost, doesn’t have an expiration date either.
Very well said. :0)
03 March 2011
Happy Birthday Gram
Today is my Gram's birthday. Sadly, she died in 1992, but there is never a day that I don't think about her and miss her. She was an AMAZING woman who weathered some serious storms in her life. My grandfather died of a heart attack at 50, leaving her to raise 4 children on her own. And that was 1959.... there weren't exactly a lot of resources, support groups or therapists to help her through it. My mom was 15 at the time, and her youngest sibling, my uncle John, was only 4. Somehow, she managed to survive and thrive and raise 4 incredible human beings. She was a woman of great faith and volunteered for everything under the sun. She was so wonderful... it's hard to explain, really. I know everyone loves their grandma and thinks they're the sweetest & the greatest. I have bad news for you though.... my Gram WAS the sweetest, most loving, giving woman on earth. Every single person she met adored her. She was always the favorite aunt to her many nieces and nephews and had a million friends. She was loved and adored by many... and is to this day. Loving you Gram... Happy Birthday. :0)
Had a weird experience at the club this morning. First of all, I KILLED it... quite proud of myself. Anyhoo, I was on the elliptical listening to Pandora on my iPhone, and the song "Faithfully" by Journey came on. That was David's and my song even before we got married. And I started to cry. I think it was the first time that I actually missed him. It took me back to 1989 and brought up a lot of memories. It's odd how things just jump up and bite you in the ass. Grief is such a fluid process, and it has no end. Those feelings really took me by surprise.
Miss Bobbin.... LOVED your response to my post about judgment... you're right on the money honey! And I think you have the best perspective on it... you recognize that it happens, but you don't let it close you off. You continue to learn and grow. And as far as I'm concerned, the minute we stop learning and growing, we may as well curl up and die. You are an awesome woman, and I adore you! AOT
Had a weird experience at the club this morning. First of all, I KILLED it... quite proud of myself. Anyhoo, I was on the elliptical listening to Pandora on my iPhone, and the song "Faithfully" by Journey came on. That was David's and my song even before we got married. And I started to cry. I think it was the first time that I actually missed him. It took me back to 1989 and brought up a lot of memories. It's odd how things just jump up and bite you in the ass. Grief is such a fluid process, and it has no end. Those feelings really took me by surprise.
Miss Bobbin.... LOVED your response to my post about judgment... you're right on the money honey! And I think you have the best perspective on it... you recognize that it happens, but you don't let it close you off. You continue to learn and grow. And as far as I'm concerned, the minute we stop learning and growing, we may as well curl up and die. You are an awesome woman, and I adore you! AOT
My Jammie Day darlings... 3 March
Still my angel baby.
The sports meeting last night was largely uneventful. The first hour was a GIANT waste of time. They had a general meeting in the auditorium for ALL of the spring sports. These bozos droned on and on about information that is ALREADY on the school website!!! AAAGGGHHH!!! The good news? I got to see my friend Elise. Her daughter is running track. We sat together and caught up, as we hadn't seen each other since Rory's birthday in December. I was happy to hear that she is getting married this summer... she and her fiance have only been engaged for 4 years! (Weird side note... Elise & Kevin (her first husband) and David & I all got married on the exact same day at the exact same time... August 10th, 1991. I was getting married at 3 p.m. on the west coast, while she was getting married at noon on the east coast. Bizarre!!!) I also got to sit and chat with my friend Nick. He's the father of Reilly's friend Megan. She really helped him last summer. He spent a lot of time at her house pouring his heart out about David.
I LOVE this guy Nick... total no shit guy. When we split off for the lacrosse meeting, we sat together. I told him he was playing with fire by sitting next to me... guilt by association... the poor fucker is SURE to be ostracized now! His response? "Oh please... I don't give a shit what these people think." Yeah, he rocks!!! And yes, as has become the norm, I was completely invisible to all of the Waterford parents who have known me since 2002. Assholes. Luckily, I've pretty much gotten used to it, so it doesn't hurt as much anymore.
I'll tell you what... Reilly had better show me something pretty soon. His grades are not great and his attitude has gotten shittier in the past week. This whole lacrosse thing is such a major commitment... financially, time-wise... all of it. If he doesn't turn it around pretty quickly, I'm gonna pull his ass from the team... and I REALLY don't want to do that. I had a chance to speak to both of the coaches, and they both really like the kid. It's nice to know that he's at least behaving well for them.
Time to go... more pics up on Shutterfly today... take a peek.
Have a good one...
S
Hi again... it's a couple hours later & I just re-read my post. Need to amend something regarding the Waterford folks ignoring me.... my sweet friend Miss Katharyn is a Waterford peep and has NEVER done that to me. Not only has she gone out of her way to help me in a million ways over the years, she talks to me like a normal person. (Well, she pretends to act like I am normal, which is quite a feat!!!) For that, Miss Kathryn... I thank you. :0) There is also one other mom that I've seen at school activities a few times this year that has always said hello to me. Her voice never fails to have a 'you poor, pathetic girl' lilt to it, and she routinely gives me the hangdog eyes, but I know that she just feels badly and doesn't know how else to act. That's okay... I certainly appreciate that she makes the effort.
Hi again... it's a couple hours later & I just re-read my post. Need to amend something regarding the Waterford folks ignoring me.... my sweet friend Miss Katharyn is a Waterford peep and has NEVER done that to me. Not only has she gone out of her way to help me in a million ways over the years, she talks to me like a normal person. (Well, she pretends to act like I am normal, which is quite a feat!!!) For that, Miss Kathryn... I thank you. :0) There is also one other mom that I've seen at school activities a few times this year that has always said hello to me. Her voice never fails to have a 'you poor, pathetic girl' lilt to it, and she routinely gives me the hangdog eyes, but I know that she just feels badly and doesn't know how else to act. That's okay... I certainly appreciate that she makes the effort.
02 March 2011
Passing judgment...
Passing judgment.... an interesting thing, really. Most people that I know, choose to associate with, etc., will be quick to tell you that they don't judge others. It's a beautiful idea, but for the most part, it's a bunch of bullshit. We all do it... or have done it, in one way or another. I can honestly tell you that I have made a concerted effort to NOT pass judgment on others. It's something I started to work on in myself about 8 years ago, but it's really come in to play in the past 3. (FYI... I DO reserve the right to pass judgment on the troll and cactus, as they are sub-human, despicable creatures. Just sayin'...)
I truly believe that every single person who has ever read my writings, has judged me or my choices at one point or another. I don't mean that in an accusatory way... it's just a fact. It's human nature. Reflect for a moment.... have you ever thought, 'why the FUCK hasn't she sold the Mercedes???'... 'why the fuck hasn't she dumped that house?'... 'why isn't she working yet?'... 'why are Finn and the kids living there?'... 'how come she has unpaid bills... isn't she getting SS death benefits?'... 'why hasn't she sold David's stuff yet?'.... 'what does she do all day?'... I could go on forever. Those might sound like plain ol' run of the mill questions... but they're not. Trust me.... no one on this earth could possibly judge me anymore harshly than I judge myself. The things that swirl around in my own head are far more heinous than anything anyone could ever say to me.
And I think it's pretty clear by now that I don't give a fat fuck what other people think of me. Sure, I'd love to be admired, adored, whatever... but I think that ship has sailed. I'm not sure why I feel the need to say all of this now. I don't know. I certainly don't have anything to prove to anyone either... but I guess I would like for everyone to understand just how hard I work, every single day. Unless you have experienced it, you cannot possibly begin to imagine the mountainous piles of death business that must be handled... still. Under the best circumstances, it's an overwhelming load. With the fucking disaster that David left behind... it's often unbearable. And that's on a good day.... sprinkle in the shit days that appear now and again, and I just want to crawl into a hole.
Got any questions? Ask my mudda. She was here... she saw... she knows. Trying to untangle all of this, keep us afloat, get the kids to school, groups, sports, searching for work, trying to figure out my future, and regular family life stuff... it's alot. I'm not having a pity party... just tellin' it like it is. Time to put dinner on the table & dash out to the lacrosse meeting.
I had no intention of ticking anyone off, but if I did... go piss up a rope! Bwahahahaha!!!! ;-)
xoxo
S
I truly believe that every single person who has ever read my writings, has judged me or my choices at one point or another. I don't mean that in an accusatory way... it's just a fact. It's human nature. Reflect for a moment.... have you ever thought, 'why the FUCK hasn't she sold the Mercedes???'... 'why the fuck hasn't she dumped that house?'... 'why isn't she working yet?'... 'why are Finn and the kids living there?'... 'how come she has unpaid bills... isn't she getting SS death benefits?'... 'why hasn't she sold David's stuff yet?'.... 'what does she do all day?'... I could go on forever. Those might sound like plain ol' run of the mill questions... but they're not. Trust me.... no one on this earth could possibly judge me anymore harshly than I judge myself. The things that swirl around in my own head are far more heinous than anything anyone could ever say to me.
And I think it's pretty clear by now that I don't give a fat fuck what other people think of me. Sure, I'd love to be admired, adored, whatever... but I think that ship has sailed. I'm not sure why I feel the need to say all of this now. I don't know. I certainly don't have anything to prove to anyone either... but I guess I would like for everyone to understand just how hard I work, every single day. Unless you have experienced it, you cannot possibly begin to imagine the mountainous piles of death business that must be handled... still. Under the best circumstances, it's an overwhelming load. With the fucking disaster that David left behind... it's often unbearable. And that's on a good day.... sprinkle in the shit days that appear now and again, and I just want to crawl into a hole.
Got any questions? Ask my mudda. She was here... she saw... she knows. Trying to untangle all of this, keep us afloat, get the kids to school, groups, sports, searching for work, trying to figure out my future, and regular family life stuff... it's alot. I'm not having a pity party... just tellin' it like it is. Time to put dinner on the table & dash out to the lacrosse meeting.
I had no intention of ticking anyone off, but if I did... go piss up a rope! Bwahahahaha!!!! ;-)
xoxo
S
Anybody out there????
Good morning. Don't really have much to say today, mostly because I'm not sure anyone is reading. Yes, I have a couple of regulars who post comments, but seriously, I'm starting to feel like I'm talking to myself. And yeah.... it's getting OLD.
I am happy to report that both Reilly and Rory have started to receive donations on their fundraising pages. Thank you SO much to those of you who have shown your support.
I just posted new pics on Shutterfly... go take a look-see.
That's all for now... shiz to do.
Later gators...
S
www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/rory-streight/fordaddy
www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/reilly-streight
***On another note.... STILL haven't gotten any response to my e-mail to the troll. Shocker. I also forwarded the boys' fundraising page info... NADA. Nice. Yep... sub-human.
I am happy to report that both Reilly and Rory have started to receive donations on their fundraising pages. Thank you SO much to those of you who have shown your support.
I just posted new pics on Shutterfly... go take a look-see.
That's all for now... shiz to do.
Later gators...
S
www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/rory-streight/fordaddy
www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/reilly-streight
***On another note.... STILL haven't gotten any response to my e-mail to the troll. Shocker. I also forwarded the boys' fundraising page info... NADA. Nice. Yep... sub-human.
01 March 2011
At last...
Just got home from fetching Reilly after practice. It was actually over by 6:30 tonight... thank god. I can't remember what I had already written when my wi-fi was interrupted this morning... ahhhh yes. Miss Bobbin, you are correct. Those fucknuts can't actually shut off my electric service as long as I continue to make payments. Here's the problem... NOVEC is just one of a handful of agencies that REFUSED to give me access to my OWN fucking accounts after D died. Within days of his death, I hand-delivered them an original death certificate and a notarized copy of my appointment as the estate administrator. No dice... they wanted more. I can't even remember how many affidavits, etc., that I provided those assbags. Anyhoo, they didn't start sending me bills until late November... so even though I continue to make sizeable payments, it'll be very difficult to catch up. And it makes me crazy that they act like I created the problem. Hellllooooo.... I tried to deal with the problem before it became a problem, as far back as the first week of July. Grrrrr.....
As for leaving this house... nope. Not happening. Not yet, anyway. You have to remember that I CAN'T live anywhere cheaper and remain in the same school attendance zones. Believe it or not, there ISN'T anything cheaper. This is an incredibly affluent area, and I've always joked that we were the white trash in these parts. Keep in mind that we live out in the country, and the closest town that would keep us in our schools is a National Historic Landmark. That means, no town houses. And only once in a blue moon is there ever something available for rent.... but I still have 8 animals, and no one would ever rent to me. I cannot stress enough how critical it is for Rory to stay at Waterford. It's his safety zone... his little cocoon, and I HAVE to figure out how to keep him there. (And oh, by the way... I now have a family of 6... so downsizing isn't really an option.) That's why I've been working my BALLS off to get this loan mod... to cut out any and all extra spending... to find a job..., etc. You'll have to trust me on this one. Not only am I going with my gut, I'm following the advice of MANY therapists, social workers, grief counselors and the like. They ALL say that staying in our home is PARAMOUNT for the boys. So that's that.
I went to the Apple store today. My phone started making some fucked up noise on Sunday, totally out of the blue. I didn't get it wet, I didn't drop it... I don't know what was going on with the damn thing. I was in that store for less than 5 minutes when they just swapped out my phone for a brand new one... FREE. Dayum! I luvvvves me some Apple customer service!!!
Tomorrow night is the mandatory, 2 HOUR lacrosse parent meeting. I got no less than 5 e-mails today telling me that I HAVE to be there. I really don't like going into a situation where I already know these people are going to piss me off... but I can feel it... it's a' comin'!
Both boys now have their own fundraising pages for the Comfort Zone run. Pleas, please, PLEASE... visit them and donate if you can. I know I've said it before, but every single dollar makes a difference. Also, please pass along the info to anyone and everyone you know. I realize that I am bordering on obnoxious with respect to this thing, but you'll have to forgive me, as I'm just a wee bit passionate about it. :0)
www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/reilly-streight
www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/rory-streight/fordaddy
Thank you!!!!
xoxo
S
As for leaving this house... nope. Not happening. Not yet, anyway. You have to remember that I CAN'T live anywhere cheaper and remain in the same school attendance zones. Believe it or not, there ISN'T anything cheaper. This is an incredibly affluent area, and I've always joked that we were the white trash in these parts. Keep in mind that we live out in the country, and the closest town that would keep us in our schools is a National Historic Landmark. That means, no town houses. And only once in a blue moon is there ever something available for rent.... but I still have 8 animals, and no one would ever rent to me. I cannot stress enough how critical it is for Rory to stay at Waterford. It's his safety zone... his little cocoon, and I HAVE to figure out how to keep him there. (And oh, by the way... I now have a family of 6... so downsizing isn't really an option.) That's why I've been working my BALLS off to get this loan mod... to cut out any and all extra spending... to find a job..., etc. You'll have to trust me on this one. Not only am I going with my gut, I'm following the advice of MANY therapists, social workers, grief counselors and the like. They ALL say that staying in our home is PARAMOUNT for the boys. So that's that.
I went to the Apple store today. My phone started making some fucked up noise on Sunday, totally out of the blue. I didn't get it wet, I didn't drop it... I don't know what was going on with the damn thing. I was in that store for less than 5 minutes when they just swapped out my phone for a brand new one... FREE. Dayum! I luvvvves me some Apple customer service!!!
Tomorrow night is the mandatory, 2 HOUR lacrosse parent meeting. I got no less than 5 e-mails today telling me that I HAVE to be there. I really don't like going into a situation where I already know these people are going to piss me off... but I can feel it... it's a' comin'!
Both boys now have their own fundraising pages for the Comfort Zone run. Pleas, please, PLEASE... visit them and donate if you can. I know I've said it before, but every single dollar makes a difference. Also, please pass along the info to anyone and everyone you know. I realize that I am bordering on obnoxious with respect to this thing, but you'll have to forgive me, as I'm just a wee bit passionate about it. :0)
www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/reilly-streight
www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/rory-streight/fordaddy
Thank you!!!!
xoxo
S
Back to da club....
Finally got my ass back to the club... second day in a row. I know, whoop de fuckin' do... 2 whole days. Aside from the fact that I rarely have time to get there because of all of the continuing death biz, a lot of the time, I just can't do it. Emotionally, ya know? Whatever. Time to make a change. I'm SO tired of being jiggly, and I HAVE to make sure I'm ready for this damn 10k so I don't drop dead!!!
Surprise, surprise, I'm even MORE cheesed off now about that ridiculous lacrosse practice last night. They didn't come out of the gym until 10:25!!! Lucky for Reilly, I didn't leave home until 10:05... I KNEW they'd be running late, so at least I didn't have to wait. And listen to this shit.... they had the JV team SIT & WATCH the varsity team practice for 2 HOURS. Awesome. I'm SO glad my kid was sitting on his ass instead of doing something productive at home.
Well shit... my connection died and I lost half of my post. No time to re-write. Gots to go!
S
Surprise, surprise, I'm even MORE cheesed off now about that ridiculous lacrosse practice last night. They didn't come out of the gym until 10:25!!! Lucky for Reilly, I didn't leave home until 10:05... I KNEW they'd be running late, so at least I didn't have to wait. And listen to this shit.... they had the JV team SIT & WATCH the varsity team practice for 2 HOURS. Awesome. I'm SO glad my kid was sitting on his ass instead of doing something productive at home.
Well shit... my connection died and I lost half of my post. No time to re-write. Gots to go!
S
28 February 2011
One more thing....
And the lacrosse ass-raping begins...
It's the FIRST DAY of lacrosse practice & I'm ready to beat someone's ass. We had some weather pass through this afternoon, so they re-scheduled practice. JV is usually on the field from 4-6:30. Get THIS.... Tonight's practice? 7-10p.m.!!! UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE!!! On what planet does that seem like an appropriate solution? Gimme a fuckin break. Not only is this the first day, it's HIGH SCHOOL..... NOT the god damned OLYMPICS!!! I have a feeling I'm about to become very unpopular with the coaching staff. If they think I'm going to be held hostage by this bullshit, they've got another thing comin'. I spoke to one of the team moms this morning, and she said these coaches NEVER end practice on time... they always go over by at least a half hour. Are you shitting me??? I cannot possibly be the only parent who has a problem with this.
I just spoke to Reilly on the phone. Luckily, his friend Patrick lives close to school and he offered to have him over this afternoon. Then his mom will take them back over for practice. We had a wee discussion about my thoughts on the whole schedule situation. Big surprise, since the entire universe revolves around him, he doesn't see the problem. I've definitely got him shakin' in his boots though... I told him I have NO problem walking on the field and telling coach the kid is done for the night. If he doesn't like it, HE can fuckin drive the kid home. I REFUSE to sit there like a lemming, just waiting for the lacrosse gods to decide they're finished. Uh, no. Reilly's tweaked because he KNOWS I'll fuckin do it. If there's no skull-cracking to be done tonight, I'm pretty sure I'll make a few enemies on Wednesday at the MANDATORY parent's meeting. I don't know who the fuck these people think they are, but we're just getting started and they're already on my last frayed little nerve.
Obviously, I don't want to cause a problem for Reilly, but this is complete madness. I'm sorry.... I was under the impression that the first priority in high school is supposed to be education. Isn't that why they call sports extra-curricular activities??? I can already feel a very heated discussion a' brewin'. I'm not stupid... I get it. This coach turned his last team into state champions. Now he's starting up a whole new program and feels like he should go balls to the wall to get it up and running. Fine. I don't give a fat fuck. I can't have my entire family life held hostage by this shit.
I saw a quote somewhere today that really resonated with me, mostly with respect to David's parental units, but it applies in other areas too. It's not like I go through life trying to make people mad at me. Quite the opposite... I'd like everyone to be happy scrappy... no drama... you know what I mean. Anyhoo... the quote was: "If, throughout the journey of your life, you have made some enemies, don't worry. It just means that you stood up for something you believed in." That is SO TRUE for me... right on the money.
Took Gee to the airport this afternoon. As always, she was busy up until the last minute... even having lunch with Rory at school. :0)
Finn's making dinner at the moment. I think I'll take my shower NOW, since I'll be out running around in the middle of the night!!!
Gots to go... hope you had a good day.
xoxo
S
***I don't know if I mentioned that Reilly has his own fundraising page up and running now. If you can donate, please visit www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/reilly-streight
***Extra HUMONGOID thanks to Miss Theresa.... she donated to BOTH pages!!!! Thanks girlie!!! AOT!!!
I just spoke to Reilly on the phone. Luckily, his friend Patrick lives close to school and he offered to have him over this afternoon. Then his mom will take them back over for practice. We had a wee discussion about my thoughts on the whole schedule situation. Big surprise, since the entire universe revolves around him, he doesn't see the problem. I've definitely got him shakin' in his boots though... I told him I have NO problem walking on the field and telling coach the kid is done for the night. If he doesn't like it, HE can fuckin drive the kid home. I REFUSE to sit there like a lemming, just waiting for the lacrosse gods to decide they're finished. Uh, no. Reilly's tweaked because he KNOWS I'll fuckin do it. If there's no skull-cracking to be done tonight, I'm pretty sure I'll make a few enemies on Wednesday at the MANDATORY parent's meeting. I don't know who the fuck these people think they are, but we're just getting started and they're already on my last frayed little nerve.
Obviously, I don't want to cause a problem for Reilly, but this is complete madness. I'm sorry.... I was under the impression that the first priority in high school is supposed to be education. Isn't that why they call sports extra-curricular activities??? I can already feel a very heated discussion a' brewin'. I'm not stupid... I get it. This coach turned his last team into state champions. Now he's starting up a whole new program and feels like he should go balls to the wall to get it up and running. Fine. I don't give a fat fuck. I can't have my entire family life held hostage by this shit.
I saw a quote somewhere today that really resonated with me, mostly with respect to David's parental units, but it applies in other areas too. It's not like I go through life trying to make people mad at me. Quite the opposite... I'd like everyone to be happy scrappy... no drama... you know what I mean. Anyhoo... the quote was: "If, throughout the journey of your life, you have made some enemies, don't worry. It just means that you stood up for something you believed in." That is SO TRUE for me... right on the money.
Took Gee to the airport this afternoon. As always, she was busy up until the last minute... even having lunch with Rory at school. :0)
Finn's making dinner at the moment. I think I'll take my shower NOW, since I'll be out running around in the middle of the night!!!
Gots to go... hope you had a good day.
xoxo
S
***I don't know if I mentioned that Reilly has his own fundraising page up and running now. If you can donate, please visit www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/reilly-streight
***Extra HUMONGOID thanks to Miss Theresa.... she donated to BOTH pages!!!! Thanks girlie!!! AOT!!!
27 February 2011
Already Sunday....
Hi monkeys. Reilly had a blast at the Ball last night. He was even crowned king and got the 'Life of the Party' award. I LOVE it. The reason it's a big deal to me is because it's not like he got the award for being a booty shaker. Since it's Cotillion, they handed out beads for having spectacular manners, mingling and talking to many different people, being exceptionally courteous to and respectful of the ladies, engaging those who were standing around alone, asking many ladies to dance, etc. He may act like a neanderthal at home, but I'm telling you, the years he's spent attending Cotillion have turned him into a very confident gentleman. The really great part? He LOVES it. When he started almost 4 years ago, ALL of his friends attended... he knew EVERYONE. They've all dropped out over the years, and there are just 3 of them left. But it's cool, because he's making friends with teens from other high schools all over the county. And as they get older, the activities are becoming increasingly more fun. Next month they're going on a 4 hour dinner cruise on the Potomac. Nice!
On to lacrosse and the GINORMOUS time commitment.... grrrrr. As for doing his work, the great thing is that the entire school has 1 hour for lunch, all at the same time. And EVERY teacher is in their room and available to the students during that time. They also have a 90 minute FLEX period every other day, and it's basically used to do homework. Except for long-term projects, papers, etc., he generally manages to get everything finished at school. His grades aren't as good as they should be though, and he's been informed that if they slip at all, lacrosse is over. He's going to have to really learn about time management & multi-tasking. I've always been good at those things, but his father SUCKED at 'em. Unfortunately, he's MUCH more like his dad than he is me. I'm definitely concerned about the transportation issue... mostly concerned about the morning work-outs and the 7 a.m. Saturday practices. Eeew. Of course, his ONE friend who has a driver's license didn't make the team. Shit! That would have been a HUGE help. It's just very important to me to continue to have family dinners and our regular evening routine for the little ones. It's gonna be a challenge!
Now I'm off to Target. Have to pick up a few scrips. I'm fairly certain I'm going to have to give them a kidney to pay for the shit... good thing I have TWO of 'em.
Gorgeous spring-like weather today. Finn is helping his dad build a shed & my mom & da boyz are going out to run a few errands. Maybe I'll have some quiet time to do some beading when I get home. :0)
Happy Sunday.
xoxo
S
On to lacrosse and the GINORMOUS time commitment.... grrrrr. As for doing his work, the great thing is that the entire school has 1 hour for lunch, all at the same time. And EVERY teacher is in their room and available to the students during that time. They also have a 90 minute FLEX period every other day, and it's basically used to do homework. Except for long-term projects, papers, etc., he generally manages to get everything finished at school. His grades aren't as good as they should be though, and he's been informed that if they slip at all, lacrosse is over. He's going to have to really learn about time management & multi-tasking. I've always been good at those things, but his father SUCKED at 'em. Unfortunately, he's MUCH more like his dad than he is me. I'm definitely concerned about the transportation issue... mostly concerned about the morning work-outs and the 7 a.m. Saturday practices. Eeew. Of course, his ONE friend who has a driver's license didn't make the team. Shit! That would have been a HUGE help. It's just very important to me to continue to have family dinners and our regular evening routine for the little ones. It's gonna be a challenge!
Now I'm off to Target. Have to pick up a few scrips. I'm fairly certain I'm going to have to give them a kidney to pay for the shit... good thing I have TWO of 'em.
Gorgeous spring-like weather today. Finn is helping his dad build a shed & my mom & da boyz are going out to run a few errands. Maybe I'll have some quiet time to do some beading when I get home. :0)
Happy Sunday.
xoxo
S
***Focus on living a quality life.***
***Take pleasure in giving to others.***
***Grow courage.***
***Stop believing your inner critic.***
-Instant Karma
Bentley... in all his adorbulousness.
I got some Bentley shnuggles on Friday. :0)
Anudda one of da kid before Cotillion.
Nerd. Need I say More?
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